5 Things I Wish I Knew Before Becoming a Mum

Becoming a mum is one of the most profound, life-changing experiences there is. It’s filled with moments of love so deep they take your breath away — but also moments of exhaustion, uncertainty, and vulnerability that no one can truly prepare you for.

At Nurturing Maternity Support, I often hear mothers say, “I wish someone had told me what it’s really like.” Not because they’d change their decision, but because understanding the emotional, physical, and mental shifts of motherhood makes the journey easier to navigate.

Here are five things I wish I knew before becoming a mum — insights I now share with the families I support every day.

1. It’s Okay If You Don’t Fall in Love Instantly

There’s a common myth that the moment your baby is placed in your arms, an overwhelming rush of love will sweep over you. For some mothers, that’s true — but for many, the bond builds gradually over time.

After birth, you’re flooded with hormones, often exhausted, and sometimes processing a physically and emotionally intense experience. It can take days, weeks, or even months for that deep connection to fully develop.

And that’s perfectly okay.

Your baby doesn’t need instant perfection; they need your gentle presence, your warmth, and your willingness to learn and grow together. Love often grows quietly — in the night feeds, the cuddles, the moments of eye contact.

Be patient with yourself. Attachment is a journey, not a single moment.

2. You Still Matter — Even When Everything Feels About the Baby

In those early days, it’s easy to lose sight of yourself. The world shifts focus entirely to your newborn — their needs, their sleep, their feeding. But your wellbeing matters just as much.

Motherhood isn’t about disappearing into your role; it’s about expanding into a new version of yourself. That means making space for rest, nourishment, and support.

You are not “selfish” for needing time for yourself. You’re human.

Something I often tell new mums is: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Your baby thrives best when you feel grounded, cared for, and connected.

So, eat when you can, accept help without guilt, and remind yourself that you are worthy of care — not just as a mother, but as you.

3. Postpartum Is a Season — Not Forever

The postpartum period can feel like a blur. Time stretches and folds in strange ways when you’re feeding around the clock, surviving on little sleep, and adjusting to an entirely new rhythm.

It can be comforting to remember that this is a season — it will pass. The long nights, the endless nappies, the uncertainty of whether you’re “doing it right.”

Eventually, your baby sleeps longer. You start to recognize yourself again. The fog begins to lift.

But just because it’s temporary doesn’t mean it should be endured in silence. The early weeks and months deserve as much care and planning as your pregnancy and birth.

That’s why, at Nurturing Maternity Support, we encourage families to prepare for the “fourth trimester” — arranging support networks, planning meals, setting realistic expectations, and learning how to rest and recover.

Motherhood begins with healing, not just doing.

4. You’ll Feel Every Emotion — Sometimes All at Once

No one talks enough about how emotionally intense motherhood can be. You can feel love, joy, frustration, guilt, pride, and overwhelm — all in the same hour.

Hormonal changes, lack of sleep, and the huge shift in identity can make emotions feel unpredictable. You might cry for no reason or feel waves of anxiety you didn’t expect.

You are not weak for feeling this way. You are adjusting to an enormous change — and that takes time and compassion.

Talk about it. With your partner, your midwife, or a trusted friend. Reach out if you feel persistently sad or anxious; you do not have to face it alone.

Emotional honesty is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself as a new mother. It opens the door to real support and reminds you that you’re not broken — you’re simply becoming.

5. You’re Doing Better Than You Think

As mothers, we’re often our own harshest critics. We question everything — from how much our baby sleeps to whether we’re feeding them the “right” way.

But here’s the truth: you are doing better than you think.

Your baby doesn’t need perfection. They need love, safety, and responsiveness — and you’re already providing that by showing up, day after day.

Motherhood isn’t measured by how clean the house is or how much laundry gets done. It’s in the small, quiet moments: the soothing whispers, the gentle rocking, the endless patience you didn’t know you had.

If you could see yourself the way your baby does — their safe place, their comfort, their world — you’d realize how incredible you truly are.

What I’ve Learned as a Maternity Support Professional

Supporting families through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum has taught me that motherhood is both beautiful and challenging — sometimes at the same time.

The mothers who thrive are not the ones who do it all alone. They’re the ones who ask for help, who give themselves grace, and who allow others to walk beside them.

That’s why at Nurturing Maternity Support, we focus on holistic, heart-centered care. From birth preparation to postnatal recovery, our sessions are designed to nurture not just babies, but mothers — emotionally, physically, and mentally.

Because when a mother is supported, the whole family flourishes.

Final Thoughts

If you’re preparing to become a mum, take this as a gentle reminder: you don’t have to know everything. You don’t have to have it all together. You don’t have to be perfect.

Becoming a mother is a process — one that unfolds with time, patience, and love. You will learn, grow, and find your rhythm, just like your baby will.

And along the way, remember that your experience, your feelings, and your wellbeing matter. You are doing an incredible job — even on the days that feel hard.

At Nurturing Maternity Support, we walk alongside families through every stage of the journey — from pregnancy to postpartum. Our sessions are designed to empower, educate, and nurture, helping mothers and partners feel supported, prepared, and connected as they step into parenthood with confidence and care.